Humor: Best of Fortunes for the month of November, 2007

Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let...
Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.

All my friends are getting married, Yes, they're all growing...
All my friends are getting married, Yes, they're all growing old, They're all staying home on the weekend, They're all doing what they're told.

Antonio Antonio Was tired of living alonio He thought he would...
Antonio Antonio Was tired of living alonio He thought he would woo Antonio Antonio Miss Lucamy Lu, Rode of on his polo ponio Miss Lucamy Lucy Molonio. And found the maid ...

Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs...
Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live. -- Dorothy Parker, "Resume", 1926

There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew...
There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew lesser and lesser. It at last grew so small, He knew nothing at all, And now he's a College Professor.

Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't...
Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't know. -- Daniel J. Boorstin

Suddenly, Professor Liebowitz realizes he has come to...
Suddenly, Professor Liebowitz realizes he has come to the seminar without his duck ...

Margaret, are you grieving Over Goldengrove unleaving? Leaves,...
Margaret, are you grieving Over Goldengrove unleaving? Leaves, like the things of man, You, with your fresh thoughts Care for, can you? Ah! as the heart grows older It will come to such sights colder By and by, nor spare a sigh Though worlds of wanwood...

Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying...
Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.

Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very...
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing. -- Dick Brandon