Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday November 15, 2007

Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay, Horace ate himself...
Much to his Mum and Dad's dismay, Horace ate himself one day. He didn't stop to say his grace, he just sat down and ate his face. "We can't have this!" his Dad declared, "If that lad's ate, he should be shared." But even as...

There was a young man from East Lizes Whose balls were of...
There was a young man from East Lizes Whose balls were of two different sizes One was so small It was no ball at all The other was large and won prizes.

There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath...
There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath the moon That he had the luck To be born of a fuck That was scraped off the sheets with a spoon.

My computer can beat up your computer. - Karl Lehenbauer
My computer can beat up your computer. - Karl Lehenbauer

Suddenly, Professor Liebowitz realizes he has come to...
Suddenly, Professor Liebowitz realizes he has come to the seminar without his duck ...

Will your long-winded speeches never end? What ails you that...
Will your long-winded speeches never end? What ails you that you keep on arguing? -- Job 16:3

You don't have to explain something you never said...
You don't have to explain something you never said. -- Calvin Coolidge

You never go anywhere without your soul.
You never go anywhere without your soul.

I love dogs, but I hate Chihuahuas. A Chihuahua isn't a dog...
I love dogs, but I hate Chihuahuas. A Chihuahua isn't a dog. It's a rat with a thyroid problem.

The main problem I have with cats is, they're not dogs...
The main problem I have with cats is, they're not dogs. -- Kevin Cowherd

Who loves me will also love my dog. -- John...
Who loves me will also love my dog. -- John Donne