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Daily Fortunes

Jan 11, 2017

Breast Feeding should not be attempted by fathers with hairy...
Breast Feeding should not be attempted by fathers with hairy chests, since they can make the baby sneeze and give it wind. -- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"

Catching his children with their hands in the new,...
Catching his children with their hands in the new, still wet, patio, the father spanked them. His wife asked, "Don't you love your children?" "In the abstract, yes, but not in the concrete."

Catproof is an oxymoron, childproof nearly so.
Catproof is an oxymoron, childproof nearly so.

Children are like cats, they can tell when you don't like them...
Children are like cats, they can tell when you don't like them. That's when they come over and violate your body space.

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite...
Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.


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