| Freebsd Fortunes: 2413 of 3566 |
Q: How many journalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Three. One to report it as an inspired government program to bring
light to the people, one to report it as a diabolical government
plot to deprive the poor of darkness, and one to win a pulitzer
prize for reporting that Electric Company hired a lightbulb
assassin to break the bulb in the first place.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2414 of 3566 |
Q: How many Martians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One and a half.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2415 of 3566 |
Q: How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem
to the earlier joke.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2416 of 3566 |
Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to screw in the lightbulb and two to fend off all those
Californians trying to share the experience.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2417 of 3566 |
Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub
with brightly colored machine tools.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2418 of 3566 |
Q: How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. The Universe spins the bulb, and the Zen master stays out
of the way.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2419 of 3566 |
Q: What's a light-year?
A: One-third less calories than a regular year.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2420 of 3566 |
Q: Why did the tachyon cross the road?
A: Because it was on the other side.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2421 of 3566 |
Q: Why do ducks have flat feet?
A: To stamp out forest fires.
Q: Why do elephants have flat feet?
A: To stamp out flaming ducks.
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| Freebsd Fortunes: 2422 of 3566 |
Q: Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
A: To prevent the sensible ones from going home.
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