Freebsd Fortunes: 1588 of 3566 |
If you sit down at a poker game and don't see a sucker, get up. You're
the sucker.
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1589 of 3566 |
If you stand on your head, you will get footprints in your hair.
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1590 of 3566 |
If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker,
It is slick to stick a lock upon your stock.
Or some joker who is slicker,
Will trick you of your liquor,
If you fail to lock your liquor with a lock.
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1591 of 3566 |
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
-- Derek Bok, president of Harvard
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1592 of 3566 |
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens
tomorrow!
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1593 of 3566 |
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car
payments.
-- Earl Wilson
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1594 of 3566 |
If you think the problem is bad now, just wait until we've solved it.
-- Arthur Kasspe
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1595 of 3566 |
If you think the United States has stood still, who built the largest
shopping center in the world?
-- Richard M. Nixon
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1596 of 3566 |
If you think the United States has stood still, who built the largest
shopping center in the world?
-- Richard Nixon
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Freebsd Fortunes: 1597 of 3566 |
If you throw a New Year's Party, the worst thing that you can do would
be to throw the kind of party where your guests wake up today, and call
you to say they had a nice time. Now you'll be be expected to throw
another party next year.
What you should do is throw the kind of party where your guest wake up
several days from now and call their lawyers to find out if they've
been indicted for anything. You want your guests to be so anxious to
avoid a recurrence of your party that they immediately start planning
parties of their own, a year in advance, just to prevent you from
having another one ...
If your party is successful, the police will knock on your door, unless
your party is very successful in which case they will lob tear gas
through your living room window. As host, your job is to make sure
that they don't arrest anybody. Or if they're dead set on arresting
someone, your job is to make sure it isn't you ...
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