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Burn's Hog Weighing Method:
(1) Get a perfectly symmetrical plank and balance it across a
(2) Put the hog on one end of the plank.
(3) Pile rocks on the other end until the plank is again
(4) Carefully guess the weight of the rocks.
-- Robert Burns
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"But don't you worry, its for a cause -- feeding global corporations
|Freebsd Fortunes: 623 of 3566|
"But I don't like Spam!!!!"
|Freebsd Fortunes: 624 of 3566|
But in our enthusiasm, we could not resist a radical overhaul of the
system, in which all of its major weaknesses have been exposed,
analyzed, and replaced with new weaknesses.
-- Bruce Leverett, "Register Allocation in Optimizing
|Freebsd Fortunes: 625 of 3566|
"But officer, I was only trying to gain enough speed so I could coast
to the nearest gas station."
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But scientists, who ought to know
Assure us that it must be so.
Oh, let us never, never doubt
What nobody is sure about.
-- Hilaire Belloc
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But soft you, the fair Ophelia:
Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws,
But get thee to a nunnery -- go!
-- Mark "The Bard" Twain
|Freebsd Fortunes: 628 of 3566|
But the greatest Electrical Pioneer of them all was Thomas Edison, who
was a brilliant inventor despite the fact that he had little formal
education and lived in New Jersey. Edison's first major invention in
1877, was the phonograph, which could soon be found in thousands of
American homes, where it basically sat until 1923, when the record was
invented. But Edison's greatest achievement came in 1879, when he
invented the electric company. Edison's design was a brilliant
adaptation of the simple electrical circuit: the electric company sends
electricity through a wire to a customer, then immediately gets the
electricity back through another wire, then (this is the brilliant
part) sends it right back to the customer again.
This means that an electric company can sell a customer the same batch
of electricity thousands of times a day and never get caught, since
very few customers take the time to examine their electricity closely.
In fact the last year any new electricity was generated in the United
States was 1937; the electric companies have been merely re-selling it
ever since, which is why they have so much free time to apply for rate
-- Dave Barry, "What is Electricity?"
|Freebsd Fortunes: 629 of 3566|
"But this has taken us far afield from interface, which is not a bad
place to be, since I particularly want to move ahead to the kludge.
Why do people have so much trouble understanding the kludge? What is a
kludge, after all, but not enough Ks, not enough ROMs, not enough RAMs,
poor quality interface and too few bytes to go around? Have I
explained yet about the bytes?"
|Freebsd Fortunes: 630 of 3566|
"But what we need to know is, do people want nasally-insertable