Freebsd Fortunes 2
fortune: 761 - 770 of 1371 from freebsd fortunes 2
Motd - Message of the Day
Humor, Quotes, Proverbs, Aphorisms...
Daily Fortunes Feed Subscribe - Daily Fortunes - motd.ambians.com
Daily fortunes for your site
Mar 29, 2024
Motd Home     Daily Fortunes     Best of Fortunes     Worst of Fortunes

Freebsd Fortunes 2

Fortune: 761 - 770 of 1371 from Freebsd Fortunes 2

Freebsd Fortunes 2:  761 of 1371

A man is walking down the street when he sees a man with four arms, and
antennae coming out of his head.  He goes up to him and says, "You're not
from around here, are you?"
        "No," replies the man with the antennae.
        "You know," continues the man, "I don't think you're an American,
either.  In fact, I bet you don't even come from this planet!"
        "Right again," says the man with four arms.  "I'm from Mars."
        "Well," says the man, "that's quite some configuration you've got
there, with those four arms and those antennae and everything."
        "We Martians all have four arms and antennae."
        "Well, that's just amazing," replies the man, "and how about that
big gold colored plate in the middle of your chest, what's that, do all
Martians have that?"
        "Well, no," says the Martian.  "Not the *goyim*."
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  762 of 1371

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be
bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.
                -- W. Somerset Maugham, "The Circle"
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  763 of 1371

A man may be so much of everything that he is nothing of anything.
                -- Samuel Johnson
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  764 of 1371

A man may sometimes be forgiven the kiss to which he is not entitled,
but never the kiss he has not the initiative to claim.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  765 of 1371

A man may well bring a horse to the water,
but he cannot make him drink with he will.
                -- John Heywood
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  766 of 1371

A man of genius makes no mistakes.
His errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery.
                -- James Joyce, "Ulysses"
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  767 of 1371

A man paints with his brains and not with his hands.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  768 of 1371

A man said to the Universe:
        "Sir, I exist!"
        "However," replied the Universe,
        "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."
                -- Stephen Crane
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  769 of 1371

A man took his wife deer hunting for the first time.  After he'd given her
some basic instructions, they agreed to separate and rendezvous later.  Before
he left, he warned her if she should fell a deer to be wary of hunters who
might beat her to the carcass and claim the kill.  If that happened, he told
her, she should fire her gun three times into the air and he would come to
her aid.
        Shortly after they separated, he heard a single shot, followed quickly
by the agreed upon signal.  Running to the scene, he found his wife standing
in a small clearing with a very nervous man staring down her gun barrel.
        "He claims this is his," she said, obviously very upset.
        "She can keep it, she can keep it!" the wide-eyed man replied.  "I
just want to get my saddle back!"
 
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  770 of 1371

A man usually falls in love with a woman who asks the kinds of questions
he is able to answer.
                -- Ronald Colman
« Prev Random Freebsd Fortunes 2   Next »
« Prev  1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12  13  14  15  16  17  18  19  20  21  22  23  24  25  26  27  28  29  30  31  32  33  34  35  36  37  38  39  40  41  42  43  44  45  46  47  48  49  50  51  52  53  54  55  56  57  58  59  60  61  62  63  64  65  66  67  68  69  70  71  72  73  74  75  76  77  78  79  80  81  82  83  84  85  86  87  88  89  90  91  92  93  94  95  96  97  98  99  100  101  102  103  104  105  106  107  108  109  110  111  112  113  114  115  116  117  118  119  120  121  122  123  124  125  126  127  128  129  130  131  132  133  134  135  136  137  138  Next »
Search [help]

About  |  Contact Us  |  Terms of Use  |  Privacy & Disclosure
FreeBsd Quotes  |  Linux Quotes