|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1991 of 2182|
Grover Cleveland, though constantly at loggerheads with the Senate, got on
better with the House of Representatives. A popular story circulating
during his presidency concerned the night he was roused by his wife crying,
"Wake up! I think there are burglars in the house."
"No, no, my dear," said the president sleepily, "in the Senate
maybe, but not in the House."
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1992 of 2182|
Growing old isn't bad when you consider the alternatives.
-- Maurice Chevalier
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1993 of 2182|
Grownups are reluctant to take science fiction seriously, and with good
reason: sci-fi is a hormonal activity, not a literary one. Its traditional
concerns are all pubescent. Secondary sexual characteristics are everywhere,
disguised. Aliens have tentacles. Telepathy allows you to have sex without
any nasty inconvenience of touching. Womblike spaceships provide balanced
meals. No one ever has to grow old -- body parts are replaceable, like
Job's daughters, and if you're lucky you can become a robot. As for the
adult world, it's simply not there; political systems tend to be naively
authoritarian (there are more lords in science fiction than on public
television) and are often ruled by young boys on quests. The most popular
sci-fi book in years, Frank Herbert's Dune, sold millions of copies by
combining all these themes: it ends with its adolescent hero conquering the
universe while straddling a giant worm.
-- Arnold Klein
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1994 of 2182|
Grub first, then ethics.
-- Bertolt Brecht
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1995 of 2182|
A French chopping center.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1996 of 2182|
The probability of a given event
occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1997 of 2182|
Guns don't kill people. Bullets kill people.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1998 of 2182|
Gunter's Airborne Discoveries:
(1) When you are served a meal aboard an aircraft,
the aircraft will encounter turbulence.
(2) The strength of the turbulence
is directly proportional to the temperature of your coffee.
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 1999 of 2182|
The red warning flag at the top of a club sandwich which prevents
the person from biting into it and puncturing the roof of his mouth.
-- "Sniglets", Rich Hall & Friends
|Freebsd Fortunes 3: 2000 of 2182|
The red warning flag at the top of a club sandwich which
prevents the person from biting into it and puncturing the roof
of his mouth.
-- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"