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If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin
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If Love Were Oil, I'd Be About A Quart Low
-- Book title by Lewis Grizzard
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If Machiavelli were a hacker, he'd have worked for the CSSG.
-- Phil Lapsley
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If Machiavelli were a programmer, he'd have worked for AT&T.
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If man is only a little lower than the angels, the angels should reform.
-- Mary Wilson Little
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If mathematically you end up with the wrong
answer, try multiplying by the page number.
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If men acted after marriage as they do during courtship, there would
be fewer divorces -- and more bankruptcies.
-- Frances Rodman
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If men are not afraid to die,
it is of no avail to threaten them with death.
If men live in constant fear of dying,
And if breaking the law means a man will be killed,
Who will dare to break the law?
There is always an official executioner.
If you try to take his place,
It is like trying to be a master carpenter and cutting wood.
If you try to cut wood like a master carpenter,
you will only hurt your hand.
-- Tao Te Ching, "Lao Tsu, #74"
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If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would
be a merrier world.
-- J.R.R. Tolkien
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If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little
of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking,
and from that to incivility and procrastination.
-- Thomas De Quincey (1785 - 1859)