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Mar 19, 2019
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Fortune: 600 - 609 of 1371 from Freebsd Fortunes 2

Freebsd Fortunes 2:  600 of 1371

A diplomat's life consists of three things: protocol, Geritol, and alcohol.
                -- Adlai Stevenson
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  601 of 1371

A distraught patient phoned her doctor's office.  "Was it true," the woman
inquired, "that the medication the doctor had prescribed was for the rest
of her life?"
        She was told that it was.  There was just a moment of silence before
the woman proceeded bravely on.  "Well, I'm wondering, then, how serious my
condition is.  This prescription is marked `NO REFILLS'".
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  602 of 1371

A diva who specializes in risque arias is an off-coloratura soprano.
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  603 of 1371

A doctor calls his patient to give him the results of his tests.  "I have
some bad news," says the doctor, "and some worse news."  The bad news is
that you only have six weeks to live."
        "Oh, no," says the patient.  "What could possibly be worse than
        "Well," the doctor replies, "I've been trying to reach you since
last Monday."
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  604 of 1371

A doctor was stranded with a lawyer in a leaky life raft in shark-infested
waters. The doctor tried to swim ashore but was eaten by the sharks. The
lawyer, however, swam safely past the bloodthirsty sharks.  "Professional
courtesy," he explained.
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  605 of 1371

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
                -- Ogden Nash
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  606 of 1371

A drama critic is a person who surprises a playwright by informing him
what he meant.
                -- Wilson Mizner
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  607 of 1371

A dream will always triumph over reality, once it is given the chance.
                -- Stanislaw Lem
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  608 of 1371

A Dublin lawyer died in poverty and many barristers of the city subscribed to
a fund for his funeral.  The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate
a shilling.  "Only a shilling?" exclaimed the man. "Only a shilling to bury
an attorney?  Here's a guinea; go and bury twenty of them."
Freebsd Fortunes 2:  609 of 1371

A fail-safe circuit will destroy others.
                -- Klipstein
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