Linux Cookie
fortune: 591 - 600 of 1140 from linux cookie
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Nov 24, 2017
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Linux Cookie

Fortune: 591 - 600 of 1140 from Linux Cookie

Linux Cookie:  591 of 1140

"They ought to make butt-flavored cat food."   --Gallagher
 
Linux Cookie:  592 of 1140

"Not only is God dead, but just try to find a plumber on weekends."
--Woody Allen
 
Linux Cookie:  593 of 1140

"It's ten o'clock... Do you know where your AI programs are?"  -- Peter Oakley
 
Linux Cookie:  594 of 1140

"Ah, you know the type.  They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks,
'cause if they couldn't, they'd have to wake up to the fact that life's one big,
scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only
reason THEY can't seem to keep up is they're a bunch of misfits and losers."
-- an analysis of neo-Nazis and such, Badger comics
 
Linux Cookie:  595 of 1140

"Interesting survey in the current Journal of Abnormal Psychology: New York
City has a higher percentage of people you shouldn't make any sudden moves
around than any other city in the world."
-- David Letterman
 
Linux Cookie:  596 of 1140

"Tourists -- have some fun with New york's hard-boiled cabbies.  When you get
to your destination, say to your driver, "Pay?  I was hitchhiking."
-- David Letterman
 
Linux Cookie:  597 of 1140

"An anthropologist at Tulane has just come back from a field trip to New
Guinea with reports of a tribe so primitive that they have Tide but not
new Tide with lemon-fresh Borax."
-- David Letterman
 
Linux Cookie:  598 of 1140

"Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham
Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today?
        1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
        2) Advising the President.
        3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his
           coffin."
-- David Letterman
 
Linux Cookie:  599 of 1140

"If Ricky Schroder and Gary Coleman had a fight on
 television with pool cues, who would win?
        1) Ricky Schroder
        2) Gary Coleman
        3) The television viewing public"
-- David Letterman
 
Linux Cookie:  600 of 1140

"If you are beginning to doubt what I am saying, you are
 probably hallucinating."
-- The Firesign Theatre, _Everything you know is Wrong_
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