|Linux Literature: 172 of 256|
The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare, "Henry IV"
|Linux Literature: 173 of 256|
The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first
half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and
pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who
hadn't heard the scream at all, but not calm or balmy or even very nice
for those who did hear the scream, discounting the little period of time
during the actual scream itself when your ears might have been hearing it
but your brain wasn't reacting yet to let you know.
-- Winning sentence, 1986 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.
|Linux Literature: 174 of 256|
The Bulwer-Lytton fiction contest is held ever year at San Jose State
Univ. by Professor Scott Rice. It is held in memory of Edward George
Earle Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873), a rather prolific and popular (in his
time) novelist. He is best known today for having written "The Last
Days of Pompeii."
Whenever Snoopy starts typing his novel from the top of his doghouse,
beginning "It was a dark and stormy night..." he is borrowing from Lord
Bulwer-Lytton. This was the line that opened his novel, "Paul Clifford,"
written in 1830. The full line reveals why it is so bad:
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents -- except
at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of
wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene
lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty
flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.
|Linux Literature: 175 of 256|
The camel died quite suddenly on the second day, and Selena fretted
sullenly and, buffing her already impeccable nails -- not for the first
time since the journey begain -- pondered snidely if this would dissolve
into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent
-- Winning sentence, 1983 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.
|Linux Literature: 176 of 256|
The countdown had stalled at 'T' minus 69 seconds when Desiree, the first
female ape to go up in space, winked at me slyly and pouted her thick,
rubbery lips unmistakably -- the first of many such advances during what
would prove to be the longest, and most memorable, space voyage of my
-- Winning sentence, 1985 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.
|Linux Literature: 177 of 256|
The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
-- William Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"
|Linux Literature: 178 of 256|
The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference
between a mermaid and a seal.
-- Mark Twain
|Linux Literature: 179 of 256|
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the
difference between lightning and the lightning bug.
-- Mark Twain
|Linux Literature: 180 of 256|
The fashion wears out more apparel than the man.
-- William Shakespeare, "Much Ado About Nothing"
|Linux Literature: 181 of 256|
The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.
-- Wm. Shakespeare, "Henry VI", Part IV