Freebsd Fortunes 3
fortune: 1555 - 1564 of 2182 from freebsd fortunes 3
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Freebsd Fortunes 3

Fortune: 1555 - 1564 of 2182 from Freebsd Fortunes 3

Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1555 of 2182

First Law of Bicycling:
        No matter which way you ride, it's uphill and against the wind.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1556 of 2182

First law of debate:
        Never argue with a fool.  People might not know the difference.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1557 of 2182

First Law of Procrastination:
        Procrastination shortens the job and places the responsibility
        for its termination on someone else (i.e., the authority who
        imposed the deadline).

Fifth Law of Procrastination:
        Procrastination avoids boredom; one never has the feeling that
        there is nothing important to do.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1558 of 2182

First Law of Socio-Genetics:
        Celibacy is not hereditary.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1559 of 2182

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity, no really
self-respecting woman would take advantage of it.
                -- George Bernard Shaw, "John Bull's Other Island"
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1560 of 2182

First Rule of History:
        History doesn't repeat itself --
        historians merely repeat each other.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1561 of 2182

First rule of public speaking.
        First, tell 'em what you're goin' to tell 'em;
        then tell 'em;
        then tell 'em what you've tole 'em.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1562 of 2182

First there was Dial-A-Prayer, then Dial-A-Recipe, and even Dial-A-Footballer.
But the south-east Victorian town of Sale has produced one to top them all.
Dial-A-Wombat.
        It all began early yesterday when Sale police received a telephone
call: "You won't believe this, and I'm not drunk, but there's a wombat in the
phone booth outside the town hall," the caller said.
        Not firmly convinced about the caller's claim to sobriety, members of
the constabulary drove to the scene, expecting to pick up a drunk.
        But there it was, an annoyed wombat, trapped in a telephone booth.
        The wombat, determined not to be had the better of again, threw its
bulk into the fray. It was eventually lassoed and released in a nearby scrub.
        Then the officers received another message ... another wombat in
another phone booth.
        There it was: *Another* angry wombat trapped in a telephone booth.
        The constables took the miffed marsupial into temporary custody and
released it, too, in the scrub.
        But on their way back to the station they happened to pass another
telephone booth, and -- you guessed it -- another imprisoned wombat.
        After some serious detective work, the lads in blue found a suspect,
and after questioning, released him to be charged on summons.
        Their problem ... they cannot find a law against placing wombats in
telephone booths.
                -- "Newcastle Morning Herald", NSW Australia, Aug 1980.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1563 of 2182

"First World" nations are the ones where people drive Japanese cars;
"Second World" nations are where First World residents go on vacation;
and "Third World" nations are the ones where people still dive out of
trees to prove their manhood.
                -- Dave Barry
 
Freebsd Fortunes 3:  1564 of 2182

Fishbowl, n:
        A glass-enclosed isolation cell where newly
        promoted managers are kept for observation.
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