Linux Definitions

aquadextrous, adj.:
        Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off
        with your toes.
                -- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"

Arbitrary systems, pl.n.:
        Systems about which nothing general can be said, save "nothing
        general can be said."

Arithmetic:
        An obscure art no longer practiced in the world's developed countries.

Armadillo:
        To provide weapons to a Spanish pickle.

Armor's Axiom:
        Virtue is the failure to achieve vice.

Armstrong's Collection Law:
        If the check is truly in the mail,
        it is surely made out to someone else.

Arnold's Addendum:
        Anything not fitting into these categories causes cancer in rats.

Arnold's Laws of Documentation:
        (1) If it should exist, it doesn't.
        (2) If it does exist, it's out of date.
        (3) Only documentation for useless programs transcends the
            first two laws.

Arthur's Laws of Love:
        (1) People to whom you are attracted invariably think you
            remind them of someone else.
        (2) The love letter you finally got the courage to send will be
            delayed in the mail long enough for you to make a fool of
            yourself in person.

ASCII:
        The control code for all beginning programmers and those who would
        become computer literate.  Etymologically, the term has come down as
        a contraction of the often-repeated phrase "ascii and you shall
        receive."
                -- Robb Russon