Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of January, 2007

"I don't think so," said Ren'e Descartes. Just...
"I don't think so," said Ren'e Descartes. Just then, he vanished.

"Text processing has made it possible to right-justify...
"Text processing has made it possible to right-justify any idea, even one which cannot be justified on any other grounds." -- J. Finnegan, USC.

Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying...
Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.

Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs...
Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live. -- Dorothy Parker

Antonio Antonio Was tired of living alonio He thought he would...
Antonio Antonio Was tired of living alonio He thought he would woo Antonio Antonio Miss Lucamy Lu, Rode of on his polo ponio Miss Lucamy Lucy Molonio. And found the maid ...

Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes, Calm down, it's only bits...
Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes, Calm down, it's only bits and bytes, Calm down, and speak to me in English, Please realize that I'm not one of your computerites.

Cthulhu Cthucks!
Cthulhu Cthucks!

Five names that I can hardly stand to hear, Including yours...
Five names that I can hardly stand to hear, Including yours and mine and one more chimp who isn't here, I can see the ladies talking how the times is gettin' hard, And that fearsome excavation on Magnolia boulevard, Yes, I'm goin' insane, And I'm...

God created a few perfect heads. The rest he covered with hair.
God created a few perfect heads. The rest he covered with hair.

Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.
Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.