Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of October, 2018

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

There once was a man from Dunoon, Who always ate soup with...
There once was a man from Dunoon, Who always ate soup with a fork. He said "When I eat Either fish, foul or flesh, I otherwise finish too quick."

There once was a whore from Regina Who had a stupendous...
There once was a whore from Regina Who had a stupendous vagina. To save herself time, She had six at a time, And another one working behind her.

There was a young blade from South Greece Whose bush did...
There was a young blade from South Greece Whose bush did so greatly increase That before he could shack He must hunt needle in stack. 'Twas as bad as being obese.

There was a young woman in Dee Who stayed with each man she...
There was a young woman in Dee Who stayed with each man she did see. When it came to a test She wished to be best, And practice makes perfect, you see.

There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in...
There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in his cave. He said "I'll admit I'm a bit of a shit, But look at the money I save."

"If I am elected, the concrete barriers around the WHITE...
"If I am elected, the concrete barriers around the WHITE HOUSE will be replaced by tasteful foam replicas of ANN MARGARET!"

Flying is the second greatest feeling you can have...
Flying is the second greatest feeling you can have. The greatest feeling? Landing... Landing is the greatest feeling you can have.

A certain young sheik of Algiers Said to his harem, "My...
A certain young sheik of Algiers Said to his harem, "My dears, Though you may think it odd of me, I'm tired of just sodomy Let's try straight fucking." (loud cheers!)

A couple was fishing near Clombe When the maid began looking...
A couple was fishing near Clombe When the maid began looking quite glum, And said, "Bother the fish! I'd rather coish!" Which they did -- which was why they had come.