Linux Definitions: 991 of 1105 |
The Heineken Uncertainty Principle:
You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.
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Linux Definitions: 992 of 1105 |
The history of warfare is similarly subdivided, although here the phases
are Retribution, Anticipation, and Diplomacy. Thus:
Retribution:
I'm going to kill you because you killed my brother.
Anticipation:
I'm going to kill you because I killed your brother.
Diplomacy:
I'm going to kill my brother and then kill you on the
pretext that your brother did it.
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Linux Definitions: 993 of 1105 |
The Illiterati Programus Canto 1:
A program is a lot like a nose: Sometimes it runs, and
sometimes it blows.
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Linux Definitions: 994 of 1105 |
The Kennedy Constant:
Don't get mad -- get even.
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Linux Definitions: 995 of 1105 |
The Law of the Letter:
The best way to inspire fresh thoughts is to seal the envelope.
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Linux Definitions: 996 of 1105 |
The Marines:
The few, the proud, the dead on the beach.
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Linux Definitions: 997 of 1105 |
The Marines:
The few, the proud, the not very bright.
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Linux Definitions: 998 of 1105 |
The Modelski Chain Rule:
(1) Look intently at the problem for several minutes. Scratch your
head at 20-30 second intervals. Try solving the problem on your
Hewlett-Packard.
(2) Failing this, look around at the class. Select a particularly
bright-looking individual.
(3) Procure a large chain.
(4) Walk over to the selected student and threaten to beat him severely
with the chain unless he gives you the answer to the problem.
Generally, he will. It may also be a good idea to give him a sound
thrashing anyway, just to show you mean business.
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Linux Definitions: 999 of 1105 |
The most dangerous organization in America today is:
(a) The KKK
(b) The American Nazi Partylove
(c) The Delta Frequent Flyer Club
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Linux Definitions: 1000 of 1105 |
The Official MBA Handbook on business cards:
Avoid overly pretentious job titles such as "Lord of the Realm,
Defender of the Faith, Emperor of India" or "Director of Corporate
Planning."
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