Linux Food

Why do so many foods come packaged in plastic?  It's quite uncanny.

Why do they call a fast a fast, when it goes so slow?

Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the
way he did.  In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an
indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less
important to him than his table or his white robe.
                -- Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless.

You can always tell the Christmas season is here when you start getting
incredibly dense, tinfoil-and-ribbon- wrapped lumps in the mail. Fruitcakes
make ideal gifts because the Postal Service has been unable to find a way to
damage them.  They last forever, largely because nobody ever eats them.  In
fact, many smart people save the fruitcakes they receive and send them back
to the original givers the next year; some fruitcakes have been passed back
and forth for hundreds of years.

The easiest way to make a fruitcake is to buy a darkish cake, then pound
some old, hard fruit into it with a mallet.  Be sure to wear safety glasses.
                -- Dave Barry, "Simple, Homespun Gifts"

You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles.
                -- Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food

You first parents of the human race... who ruined yourself for an apple,
what might you have done for a truffled turkey?
                -- Brillat-savarin, "Physiologie du Gout"

You know you have a small apartment when Rice Krispies echo.
                -- S. Rickly Christian

You know you're a little fat if you have stretch marks on your car.
                -- Cyrus, Chicago Reader 1/22/82

You must dine in our cafeteria.  You can eat dirt cheap there!!!!