Linux Law

In the olden days in England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or a
loaf of bread.  However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it to
you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by forty
lashes with the cat or the dog, whichever was handy.  If you stole a dog
and were caught, you were punished with twelve rabbit punches, although it
was hard to find rabbits big enough or strong enough to punch you.
                -- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"

In Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is against the law to open a soda bottle without
the supervision of a licensed engineer.

In West Union, Ohio, No married man can go flying without his spouse
along at any time, unless he has been married for more than 12 months.

It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of
indulgence for infanticide.  A question of interest, my dear Sir!  The jury
is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim
of infanticide.
                -- Edmond About

It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of
Urbana, Illinois.

It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood
Boulevard at one time.

It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro, Georgia.

It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong.  Our
offense consists in doubting it.
                -- Justice Robert H. Jackson

It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing,
each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other
has gone.

        It seems these two guys, George and Harry, set out in a Hot Air
balloon to cross the United States.  After forty hours in the air, George
turned to Harry, and said, "Harry, I think we've drifted off course!  We
need to find out where we are."
        Harry cools the air in the balloon, and they descend to below the
cloud cover.  Slowly drifting over the countryside, George spots a man
standing below them and yells out, "Excuse me!  Can you please tell me
where we are?"
        The man on the ground yells back, "You're in a balloon, approximately
fifty feet in the air!"
        George turns to Harry and says, "Well, that man *must* be a lawyer".
        Replies Harry, "How can you tell?".
        "Because the information he gave us is 100% accurate, and totally
useless!"

That's the end of The Joke, but for you people who are still worried about
George and Harry: they end up in the drink, and make the front page of the
New York Times: "Balloonists Soaked by Lawyer".