Linux Songs Poems

How doth the little crocodile
        Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
        On every golden scale!

How cheerfully he seems to grin,
        How neatly spreads his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in,
        With gently smiling jaws!
                -- Lewis Carrol, "Alice in Wonderland"

How doth the VAX's C-compiler
        Improve its object code.
And even as we speak does it
        Increase the system load.

How patiently it seems to run
        And spit out error flags,
While users, with frustration, all
        Tear their clothes to rags.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall!
All the king's horses,
And all the king's men,
Had scrambled eggs for breakfast again!

I always will remember --               I was in no mood to trifle;
'Twas a year ago November --            I got down my trusty rifle
I went out to shoot some deer           And went out to stalk my prey --
On a morning bright and clear.          What a haul I made that day!
I went and shot the maximum             I tied them to my bumper and
The game laws would allow:              I drove them home somehow,
Two game wardens, seven hunters,        Two game wardens, seven hunters,
And a cow.                              And a cow.

The Law was very firm, it               People ask me how I do it
Took away my permit--                   And I say, "There's nothin' to it!
The worst punishment I ever endured.    You just stand there lookin' cute,
It turns out there was a reason:        And when something moves, you shoot."
Cows were out of season, and            And there's ten stuffed heads
One of the hunters wasn't insured.      In my trophy room right now:
                                        Two game wardens, seven hunters,
                                        And a pure-bred guernsey cow.
                -- Tom Lehrer, "The Hunting Song"

I am changing my name to Chrysler
I am going down to Washington, D.C.
I will tell some power broker
        What they did for Iacocca
Will be perfectly acceptable to me!

I am changing my name to Chrysler,
I am heading for that great receiving line.
When they hand a million grand out,
        I'll be standing with my hand out,
Yessir, I'll get mine!

I B M
U B M
We all B M
For I B M!!!!
                -- H.A.R.L.I.E.

I can live without
Someone I love
But not without
Someone I need.
                -- "Safety"

I can see him a'comin'
With his big boots on,
With his big thumb out,
He wants to get me.
He wants to hurt me.
He wants to bring me down.
But some time later,
When I feel a little straighter,
I'll come across a stranger
Who'll remind me of the danger,
And then.... I'll run him over.
Pretty smart on my part!
To find my way... In the dark!
                -- Phil Ochs

I can't complain, but sometimes I still do.
                -- Joe Walsh

I don't know what Descartes' got,
But booze can do what Kant cannot.
                -- Mike Cross