Linux Politics

I went to my mother and told her I intended to commence a different life.  I
asked for and obtained her blessing and at once commenced the career of a
robber.
                -- Tiburcio Vasquez

I wish a robot would get elected president.  That way, when he came to town,
we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.
                -- Jack Handley

I would like the government to do all it can to mitigate, then, in
understanding, in mutuality of interest, in concern for the common good,
our tasks will be solved.
                -- Warren G. Harding

I would like to electrocute everyone who uses the word 'fair' in connection
with income tax policies.
                -- William F. Buckley

I would much rather have men ask why I have no statue, than why I have one.
                -- Marcus Procius Cato

I would rather be a serf in a poor man's house and be above ground than
reign among the dead.
                -- Achilles, "The Odessey", XI, 489-91

I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the
whole field to private industry.
                -- Joseph Heller

"I'll carry your books, I'll carry a tune, I'll carry on, carry over,
carry forward, Cary Grant, cash & carry, Carry Me Back To Old Virginia,
I'll even Hara Kari if you show me how, but I will *not* carry a gun."
                -- Hawkeye, M*A*S*H

"I'll rob that rich person and give it to some poor deserving slob.
That will *prove* I'm Robin Hood."
                -- Daffy Duck, "Robin Hood Daffy", [1958, Chuck Jones]

I'm going to Vietnam at the request of the White House.  President Johnson
says a war isn't really a war without my jokes.
                -- Bob Hope