Linux Computers

Do you suffer painful elimination?
                -- Don Knuth, "Structured Programming with Gotos"

Do you suffer painful recrimination?
                -- Nancy Boxer, "Structured Programming with Come-froms"

Do you suffer painful illumination?
                -- Isaac Newton, "Optics"

Do you suffer painful hallucination?
                -- Don Juan, cited by Carlos Casteneda

Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and
when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
                -- Dick Brandon

Documentation is the castor oil of programming.
Managers know it must be good because the programmers hate it so much.

Does a good farmer neglect a crop he has planted?
Does a good teacher overlook even the most humble student?
Does a good father allow a single child to starve?
Does a good programmer refuse to maintain his code?
                -- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"

Don't compare floating point numbers solely for equality.

Don't get suckered in by the comments -- they can be terribly misleading.
Debug only code.
                -- Dave Storer

Don't hit the keys so hard, it hurts.

Don't sweat it -- it's only ones and zeros.
                -- P. Skelly

DOS Air:
All the passengers go out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it
until it gets in the air, hop on, jump off when it hits the ground again.
Then they grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop on, et
cetera.

DOS Beer: Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to
read the directions carefully before opening the can. Originally only
came in an 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can. However, the can is
divided into 8 compartments of 2 oz. each, which have to be accessed
separately.  Soon to be discontinued, although a lot of people are going
to keep drinking it after it's no longer available.