Linux Drugs

He knew the tavernes well in every toun.
                -- Geoffrey Chaucer

He's just like Capistrano, always ready for a few swallows.

"Hey!  Who took the cork off my lunch??!"
                -- W. C. Fields

HOGAN'S HEROES DRINKING GAME --
        Take a shot every time:

-- Sergeant Schultz says, "I knoooooowww nooooothing!"
-- General Burkhalter or Major Hochstetter intimidate/insult Colonel Klink.
-- Colonel Klink falls for Colonel Hogan's flattery.
-- One of the prisoners sneaks out of camp (one shot for each prisoner to go).
-- Colonel Klink snaps to attention after answering the phone (two shots
        if it's one of our heroes on the other end).
-- One of the Germans is threatened with being sent to the Russian front.
-- Corporal Newkirk calls up a German in his phoney German accent, and
        tricks him (two shots if it's Colonel Klink).
-- Hogan has a romantic interlude with a beautiful girl from the underground.
-- Colonel Klink relates how he's never had an escape from Stalag 13.
-- Sergeant Schultz gives up a secret (two shots if he's bribed with food).
-- The prisoners listen to the Germans' conversation by a hidden transmitter.
-- Sergeant Schultz "captures" one of the prisoners after an escape.
-- Lebeau pronounces "colonel" as "cuh-loh-`nell".
-- Carter builds some kind of device (two shots if it's not explosive).
-- Lebeau wears his apron.
-- Hogan says "We've got no choice" when someone claims that the plan is
        impossible.
-- The prisoners capture an important German, and sneak him out the tunnel.

I can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury my liver.
                -- Phil Harris

I distrust a man who says when.  If he's got to be careful not to drink
too much, it's because he's not to be trusted when he does.
                -- Sidney Greenstreet, "The Maltese Falcon"

I don't drink, I don't like it, it makes me feel too good.
                -- K. Coates

I drink to make other people interesting.
                -- George Jean Nathan

I gave up Smoking, Drinking and Sex.  It was the most *horrifying* 20
minutes of my life!

I have just had eighteen whiskeys in a row.  I do believe that is a record.
                -- Dylan Thomas, his last words