Linux Work

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too,
provided you use them for business purposes.  For example, if you subscribe
to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the
cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S. Supreme Court Chief
Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax decision: "Where else are you
going to read the paper?  Outside?  What if it rains?"
        -- Dave Barry, "Sweating Out Taxes"

All this big deal about white collar crime -- what's WRONG with white collar
crime?  Who enjoys his job today?  You?  Me?  Anybody?  The only satisfying
part of any job is coffee break, lunch hour and quitting time.  Years ago
there was at least the hope of improvement -- eventual promotion -- more
important jobs to come.  Once you can be sold the myth that you may make
president of the company you'll hardly ever steal stamps.  But nobody
believes he's going to be president anymore.  The more people change jobs
the more they realize that there is a direct connection between working for
a living and total stupefying boredom.  So why NOT take revenge?  You're not
going to find ME knocking a guy because he pads an expense account and his
home stationery carries the company emblem.  Take away crime from the white
collar worker and you will rob him of his last vestige of job interest.
        -- J. Feiffer

All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun.
Money's just the way we keep score.
        -- Henry Tyroon

All warranty and guarantee clauses become null and void upon payment of invoice.

America works less, when you say "Union Yes!"

American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees
be honest and hardworking.  It has even stopped hoping for employees who are
educated enough that they can tell the difference between the men's room and
the women's room without having little pictures on the doors.
        -- Dave Barry, "Urine Trouble, Mister"

An office party is not, as is sometimes supposed the Managing Director's
chance to kiss the tea-girl.  It is the tea-girl's chance to kiss the
Managing Director (however bizarre an ambition this may seem to anyone
who has seen the Managing Director face on).
        -- Katherine Whitehorn, "Roundabout"

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed
to be doing at the moment.
        -- Robert Benchley

Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.
        -- Publius Syrus