Linux Work

Vests are to suits as seat-belts are to cars.

VI:
    A hungry dog hunts best.
    A hungrier dog hunts even better.
VII:
    Decreased business base increases overhead.
    So does increased business base.
VIII:
    The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator
    is fifth grade arithmetic.
IX:
    Acronyms and abbreviations should be used to the maximum extent
    possible to make trivial ideas profound.  Q.E.D.
X:
    Bulls do not win bull fights; people do.
    People do not win people fights; lawyers do.
        -- Norman Augustine

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by spontaneously moving
from where you left them to where you can't find them.

    WARNING TO ALL PERSONNEL:

Firings will continue until morale improves.

Waste not, get your budget cut next year.

We all like praise, but a hike in our pay is the best kind of ways.

We all live in a state of ambitious poverty.
        -- Decimus Junius Juvenalis

We are not a loved organization, but we are a respected one.
        -- John Fisher

    We have some absolutely irrefutable statistics to show exactly why
you are so tired.
    There are not as many people actually working as you may have thought.
    The population of this country is 200 million.  84 million are over
60 years of age, which leaves 116 million to do the work.  People under 20
years of age total 75 million, which leaves 41 million to do the work.
    There are 22 million who are employed by the government, which leaves
19 million to do the work.  Four million are in the Armed Services, which
leaves 15 million to do the work.  Deduct 14,800,000, the number in the state
and city offices, leaving 200,000 to do the work.  There are 188,000 in
hospitals, insane asylums, etc., so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.
    Now it may interest you to know that there are 11,998 people in jail,
so that leaves just 2 people to carry the load. That is you and me, and
brother, I'm getting tired of doing everything myself!

"We maintain that the very foundation of our way of life is what we call
free enterprise," said Cash McCall, "but when one of our citizens
show enough free enterprise to pile up a little of that profit, we do
our best to make him feel that he ought to be ashamed of himself."
        -- Cameron Hawley