Linux Food
fortune: 128 - 137 of 198 from linux food
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Linux Food

Fortune: 128 - 137 of 198 from Linux Food

Linux Food:  128 of 198

Put a pot of chili on the stove to simmer.  Let it simmer.  Meanwhile,
broil a good steak.  Eat the steak.  Let the chili simmer.  Ignore it.
                -- Recipe for chili from Allan Shrivers, former governor
                   of Texas.
 
Linux Food:  129 of 198

Put cats in the coffee and mice in the tea!
 
Linux Food:  130 of 198

Remember, DESSERT is spelled with two `s's while DESERT is spelled with
one, because EVERYONE wants two desserts, but NO ONE wants two deserts.
                -- Miss Oglethorp, Gr. 5, PS. 59
 
Linux Food:  131 of 198

RULES OF EATING -- THE BRONX DIETER'S CREED
        (1)  Never eat on an empty stomach.
        (2)  Never leave the table hungry.
        (3)  When traveling, never leave a country hungry.
        (4)  Enjoy your food.
        (5)  Enjoy your companion's food.
        (6)  Really taste your food.  It may take several portions to
             accomplish this, especially if subtly seasoned.
        (7)  Really feel your food.  Texture is important.  Compare,
             for example, the texture of a turnip to that of a
             brownie.  Which feels better against your cheeks?
        (8)  Never eat between snacks, unless it's a meal.
        (9)  Don't feel you must finish everything on your plate.  You
             can always eat it later.
        (10) Avoid any wine with a childproof cap.
        (11) Avoid blue food.
                -- Richard Smith, "The Bronx Diet"
 
Linux Food:  132 of 198

Sacred cows make great hamburgers.
 
Linux Food:  133 of 198

Save gas, don't eat beans.
 
Linux Food:  134 of 198

Seeing is deceiving.  It's eating that's believing.
                -- James Thurber
 
Linux Food:  135 of 198

So much food; so little time!
 
Linux Food:  136 of 198

Some circumstantial evidence is very strong, as when you find a trout in
the milk.
                -- Thoreau
 
Linux Food:  137 of 198

The basic menu item, in fact the ONLY menu item, would be a food unit called
the "patty," consisting of -- this would be guaranteed in writing -- "100
percent animal matter of some kind." All patties would be heated up and then
cooled back down in electronic devices immediately before serving.  The
Breakfast Patty would be a patty on a bun with lettuce, tomato, onion, egg,
Ba-Ko-Bits, Cheez Whiz, a Special Sauce made by pouring ketchup out of a
bottle and a little slip of paper stating: "Inspected by Number 12."  The
Lunch or Dinner Patty would be any Breakfast Patties that didn't get sold in
the morning. The Seafood Lover's Patty would be any patties that were
starting to emit a serious aroma.  Patties that were too rank even to be
Seafood Lover's Patties would be compressed into wads and sold as "Nuggets."
                -- Dave Barry, "'Mister Mediocre' Restaurants"
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