Linux People

Some people around here wouldn't recognize subtlety if it hit them on the head.

Some people cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Some people have a way about them that seems to say: "If I have
only one life to live, let me live it as a jerk."

Some people have parts that are so private they themselves have no
knowledge of them.

Some people's mouths work faster than their brains.  They say things they
haven't even thought of yet.

Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall.

Someone will try to honk your nose today.

Something better...

 1 (obvious): Excuse me.  Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face?
 2 (meteorological): Everybody take cover.  She's going to blow.
 3 (fashionable): You know, you could de-emphasize your nose if you wore
        something larger.  Like ... Wyoming.
 4 (personal): Well, here we are.  Just the three of us.
 5 (punctual): Alright gentlemen.  Your nose was on time but you were fifteen
        minutes late.
 6 (envious): Oooo, I wish I were you.  Gosh.  To be able to smell your
        own ear.
 7 (naughty): Pardon me, Sir.  Some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn't
        mind putting that thing away.
 8 (philosophical): You know.  It's not the size of a nose that's important.
        It's what's in it that matters.
 9 (humorous): Laugh and the world laughs with you.  Sneeze and it's goodbye,
        Seattle.
10 (commercial): Hi, I'm Earl Schibe and I can paint that nose for $39.95.
11 (polite): Ah.  Would you mind not bobbing your head.  The orchestra keeps
        changing tempo.
12 (melodic): Everybody! "He's got the whole world in his nose."
                -- Steve Martin, "Roxanne"

Something better...

13 (sympathetic): Oh, What happened?  Did your parents lose a bet with God?
14 (complimentary): You must love the little birdies to give them this to
        perch on.
15 (scientific): Say, does that thing there influence the tides?
16 (obscure): Oh, I'd hate to see the grindstone.
17 (inquiry): When you stop to smell the flowers, are they afraid?
18 (french): Say, the pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you
        leave.
19 (pornographic): Finally, a man who can satisfy two women at once.
20 (religious): The Lord giveth and He just kept on giving, didn't He.
21 (disgusting): Say, who mows your nose hair?
22 (paranoid): Keep that guy away from my cocaine!
23 (aromatic): It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the
        coffee ... in Brazil.
24 (appreciative): Oooo, how original.  Most people just have their teeth
        capped.
25 (dirty): Your name wouldn't be Dick, would it?
                -- Steve Martin, "Roxanne"

Something unpleasant is coming when men are anxious to tell the truth.
                -- Benjamin Disraeli