Linux Men Women

A man was talking to his best friend about his married life.  "You know," he
says, "I really trust my wife, and I think she has always been faithful to
me, but there's *always* that doubt.  There's *always* that little doubt."
        "Yeah, I know what you mean," his friend replies.
        "Well, buddy, I've got to leave on a business trip this weekend,
and I wonder... well... would you watch my house while I'm gone?  I trust
her, it's just that there's *always* that doubt."
        The friend agreed to help out and two weeks later gave his report.
        "I've got some bad news for you," says the friend.  "The evening
after you left I saw a strange car pull up in front of your house.  A man
got out of the car and went in the house and had dinner with your wife.
After dinner they went upstairs and I saw your wife kissing him.  Then, he
took off his shirt and she took off her blouse.  And then the light went
out."
        "*Then* what happened?" said the husband, his eyes opening wide.
        "Well, I don't know," replied the friend, "it was too dark to see."
        "Damn!" roared the husband.  "You see what I mean?  There's *always*
that doubt!"

A man without a woman is like a statue without pigeons.

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small package.

A man's gotta know his limitations.
                -- Clint Eastwood, "Dirty Harry"

A modest woman, dressed out in all her finery, is the most tremendous object
in the whole creation.
                -- Goldsmith

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman
makes a fool of him in twenty minutes.
                -- Frost

A pedestal is as much a prison as any small, confined space.
                -- Gloria Steinem

A pretty woman can do anything; an ugly woman must do everything.

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions
your wife asks you for nothing.
                -- Joey Adams

        A pushy romeo asked a gorgeous elevator operator, "Don't all these
stops and starts get you pretty worn out?"  "It isn't the stops and starts
that get on my nerves, it's the jerks."