Freebsd Limericks

A handsome young rodent named Gratian
As a lifeguard became a sensation.
        All the lady mice waved
        And screamed to be saved
By his mouse-to-mouse resuscitation.

A happy old hooker named Grace
Once sponsored a cunt-lapping race.
        It was hard for beginners
        To tell who were winners :
There were cunt hairs all over the place.

A hardware debugger named Court
Shoved his tool in an Ethernet port.
        But its buffer array
        Only handled 1K,
So the port's driver cut it off short.

A haughty young wench of Del Norte
Would fuck only men over forty.
        Said she, "It's too quick
        With a young fellow's prick;
I like it to last, and be warty."

A headstrong young woman in Ealing
Threw her two weeks' old child at the ceiling;
        When quizzed why she did,
        She replied, "To be rid
Of a strange, overpowering feeling."
                -- Edward Gorey

A hearty young fellow named Yost
Once had an affair with a ghost.
        At the height of the spasm
        The poor ectoplasm
Cried, "Goodie, I feel it ... almost."

A hearty young fellow named Yost
Once had an affair with a ghost.
        At the height of the spasm
        The poor ectoplasm
Cried, "Goodie, I feel it... almost."

A hidebound young virgin named Carrie
Would say, when the fellows got hairy :
        "Keep your prick in your pants
        Till the end of this dance--"
Which is why Carrie still has her cherry.

A highly aesthetic young Jew
Had eyes of a heavenly blue;
        The end of his dillie
        Was shaped like a lilly,
And his balls were too utterly two!

A highway patrol buff named Claire,
Once screwed half a troop on a dare,
        And her parts grew so hot,
        There was steam on her twat,
So they nicknamed her Smokey the Bare!