Humor: Best of Fortunes for the year 2024

There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years...
There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years for his chance; Then he muffed it...

Ladies and Gentlemen, Hobos and Tramps, Cross-eyed mosquitos...
Ladies and Gentlemen, Hobos and Tramps, Cross-eyed mosquitos and bowlegged ants, I come before you to stand behind you To tell you of something I know nothing about. Next Thursday (which is good Friday), There will be a convention held in the Women's...

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.

There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out...
There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out of brass. When they clanged together, They played "Stormy Weather", And lightning shot out of his ass.

There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package...
There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package of seeds. Great tufts of grass Sprouted out of his ass And his balls were all covered with weeds.

There was a young fellow of Kent Whose prick was so long that...
There was a young fellow of Kent Whose prick was so long that it bent, So to save himself trouble He put it in double, And instead of coming he went.

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

This PIZZA symbolizes my COMPLETE EMOTIONAL RECOVERY!!
This PIZZA symbolizes my COMPLETE EMOTIONAL RECOVERY!!

Latin is a language, As dead as can be. First it killed...
Latin is a language, As dead as can be. First it killed the Romans, And now it's killing me.