Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Saturday March 12, 2016

A man was once heard to boast, That he received a parcel...
A man was once heard to boast, That he received a parcel by post, It contained, so we heard, A magnificent turd, And the balls of his grandfather's ghost.

There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing machine. Both concave and convex, It could please either sex, But, oh, what a bastard to clean!

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin on his weeny. Just to be couth, He added vermouth, And slipped his girlfriend a martini.

There once was a man named Parridge With peculiar views...
There once was a man named Parridge With peculiar views on marriage. He sucked off his brother, Fucked his own mother, And gobbled his sister's miscarriage.

There was a young fellow named Bill, Who took an atomic pill, ...
There was a young fellow named Bill, Who took an atomic pill, His navel corroded, His asshole exploded, And they found his nuts in Brazil.

There was a young hayseed from Tiffan Whose cock would...
There was a young hayseed from Tiffan Whose cock would constantly stiffen. The knob out in front Attracted foul cunt Which he greatly delighted in sniffin'.

There was a young lady of Spain Who was fucked by a monk in...
There was a young lady of Spain Who was fucked by a monk in a drain. They did it again And again and again, And again and again and again.