Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday July 23, 2014

Those of you who think you know it all upset those of us who do.
Those of you who think you know it all upset those of us who do.

A scandal involving an oyster Sent the Countess of Clews to...
A scandal involving an oyster Sent the Countess of Clews to a cloister She preferred it, in bed, To the count (so she said) 'Cause it's longer and stronger and moister.

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor,...
There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor, "Gol dern ya, When you work on my middle Be sure you don't fiddle With things that do not concern ya."

There was an old lady of Kewry Whose cunt was a `lusus...
There was an old lady of Kewry Whose cunt was a `lusus naturae': The `introitus vaginae', Was unnaturally tiny, And the thought of it filled her with fury.