Linux Art
fortune: 159 - 168 of 460 from linux art
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Linux Art

Fortune: 159 - 168 of 460 from Linux Art

Linux Art:  159 of 460

  I. Any body suspended in space will remain in space until made aware of
     its situation.
        Daffy Duck steps off a cliff, expecting further pastureland.  He
        loiters in midair, soliloquizing flippantly, until he chances to
        look down.  At this point, the familiar principle of 32 feet per
        second per second takes over.
 II. Any body in motion will tend to remain in motion until solid matter
     intervenes suddenly.
        Whether shot from a cannon or in hot pursuit on foot, cartoon
        characters are so absolute in their momentum that only a telephone
        pole or an outsize boulder retards their forward motion absolutely.
        Sir Isaac Newton called this sudden termination of motion the
        stooge's surcease.
III. Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation
     conforming to its perimeter.
        Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the
        speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless
        cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through
        the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole.  The
        threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
                -- Esquire, "O'Donnell's Laws of Cartoon Motion", June 1980
 
Linux Art:  160 of 460

If *I* had a hammer, there'd be no more folk singers.
 
Linux Art:  161 of 460

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
                -- Paul Beatty
 
Linux Art:  162 of 460

If an average person on the subway turns to you, like an ancient mariner,
and starts telling you her tale, you turn away or nod and hope she stops,
not just because you fear she might be crazy.  If she tells her tale on
camera, you might listen.  Watching strangers on television , even
responding to them from a studio audience, we're disengaged -- voyeurs
collaborating with exhibitionists in rituals of sham community.  Never
have so many known so much about people for whom they cared so little.
                -- Wendy Kaminer commenting on testimonial television
                   in "I'm Dysfunctional, You're Dysfunctional".
 
Linux Art:  163 of 460

If Beethoven's Seventh Symphony is not by some means abridged, it will soon
fall into disuse.
                -- Philip Hale, Boston music critic, 1837
 
Linux Art:  164 of 460

If dolphins are so smart, why did Flipper work for television?
 
Linux Art:  165 of 460

If God didn't mean for us to juggle, tennis balls wouldn't come three to a can.
 
Linux Art:  166 of 460

If God had intended Man to Watch TV, He would have given him Rabbit Ears.
 
Linux Art:  167 of 460

If I had any humility I would be perfect.
                -- Ted Turner
 
Linux Art:  168 of 460

If I had done everything I'm credited with, I'd be speaking to you from
a laboratory jar at Harvard.
                -- Frank Sinatra

AS USUAL, YOUR INFORMATION STINKS.
                -- Frank Sinatra, telegram to "Time" magazine
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