Linux Men Women

I want to buy a husband who, every week when I sit down to watch "St.
Elsewhere", won't scream, "Forget it, Blanche... It's time for Hee-Haw!"
                -- Berke Breathed, "Bloom County"

I want to marry a girl just like the girl that married dear old dad.
                -- Freud

I was in a beauty contest one.  I not only came in last, I was hit in
the mouth by Miss Congeniality.
                -- Phyllis Diller

I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth.
                -- Chico Marx

I will not say that women have no character; rather, they have a new
one every day.
                -- Heine

I would gladly raise my voice in praise of women, only they won't let me
raise my voice.
                -- Winkle

I wouldn't marry her with a ten foot pole.

I'd probably settle for a vampire if he were romantic enough.
Couldn't be any worse than some of the relationships I've had.
                -- Brenda Starr

I'd rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42.
                -- W.C. Fields

I'm defending her honor, which is more than she ever did.