Daily Fortunes

Nov 26, 2015

"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what...
"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet." -- Jay Leno

If you have received a letter inviting you to speak at...
If you have received a letter inviting you to speak at the dedication of a new cat hospital, and you hate cats, your reply, declining the invitation, does not necessarily have to cover the full range of your emotions. You must make it clear that you will not attend,...

In the eyes of my dog, I'm a man. -- Martin...
In the eyes of my dog, I'm a man. -- Martin Mull

It is not a good omen when goldfish commit suicide.
It is not a good omen when goldfish commit suicide.

It was Penguin lust... at its ugliest.
It was Penguin lust... at its ugliest.

Daily Fortunes for Nov 26, 2015

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