Daily Fortunes Mar 19, 2008 - motd.ambians.com Motd - Message of the Day
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Mar 19, 2008

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something...
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles." -- Ronnie Shakes

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head...
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. -- Samuel Goldwyn

Aquavit is also considered useful for medicinal purposes,...
Aquavit is also considered useful for medicinal purposes, an essential ingredient in what I was once told is the Norwegian cure for the common cold. You get a bottle, a poster bed, and the brightest colored stocking cap you can find. You put the cap on the post at...

As a general rule of thumb, never trust anybody who's...
As a general rule of thumb, never trust anybody who's been in therapy for more than 15 percent of their life span. The words "I am sorry" and "I am wrong" will have totally disappeared from their vocabulary. They will stab you, shoot you, break...

At the hospital, a doctor is training an intern on how...
At the hospital, a doctor is training an intern on how to announce bad news to the patients. The doctor tells the intern "This man in 305 is going to die in six months. Go in and tell him." The intern boldly walks into the room, over to the man's bedisde...

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