Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday August 19, 2017

Let the worthy citizens of Chicago get their liquor the best...
Let the worthy citizens of Chicago get their liquor the best way they can. I'm sick of the job. It's a thankless one and full of grief. -- Capone

There once was a man named Parridge With peculiar views...
There once was a man named Parridge With peculiar views on marriage. He sucked off his brother, Fucked his own mother, And gobbled his sister's miscarriage.

There was a young lady from Wheeling Who claimed to lack sexual...
There was a young lady from Wheeling Who claimed to lack sexual feeling. But a cynic named Boris Just touched her clitoris And she had to be scraped off the ceiling.

All of life is a blur of Republicans and meat!
All of life is a blur of Republicans and meat!

All right, you degenerates! I want this place evacuated in...
All right, you degenerates! I want this place evacuated in 20 seconds!