Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday February 4, 2020

A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse...
A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse of his wife. "How could I know, Judge? She was cold, did not budge-- Just the same as she'd acted in life."

A newlywed couple from Goshen Spent their honeymoon sailing...
A newlywed couple from Goshen Spent their honeymoon sailing the ocean. In twenty-eight days They got laid eighty ways -- Imagine such fucking devotion!

There once was a young man named Gene, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a young man named Gene, Who invented a screwing machine. Concave and convex, It served either sex, And it played with itself inbetween.

There once were two brothers named Luntz Who buggered each...
There once were two brothers named Luntz Who buggered each other at once. When asked to account For this intricate mount, They said, "Ass-holes are tighter than cunts."