|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 878 of 1371|
A rabbi and a priest are sitting together on a train, and the rabbi leans
over and asks, "So, how high can you advance in your organization?"
The priest replies, "Well, if I am lucky, I guess I could become a
"Well, could you get any higher than that?"
"I suppose that if my works are seen in a very good light that I
might be made an Archbishop."
"Is there any way that you might go higher than that?"
"If all the Saints should smile, I guess I could be made a Cardinal."
"Could you be anything higher than a Cardinal?"
Hesitating a little bit, the priest said, "I suppose that I could
be elected Pope, but only if it's God's will."
"And could you be anything higher than that, is there any way to go
up from being the Pope?"
"What?! I should be the Messiah himself?!"
The rabbi leaned back and smiled. "One of our boys made it."
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 879 of 1371|
A raccoon tangled with a 23,000 volt line today. The results
blacked out 1400 homes and, of course, one raccoon.
-- Steel City News
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 880 of 1371|
A racially integrated community is a chronological term timed from the
entrance of the first black family to the exit of the last white family.
-- Saul Alinsky
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 881 of 1371|
A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having
his neighbor notice it.
-- Trygve Lie
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 882 of 1371|
A real estate agent, looking over a farmer's house for possible sale,
commented to the farmer how sturdy the house looked.
The farmer replied, "Yep, built it with my bare hands... did it
the hard way. The steps to the front door, here, carved 'em out of
field stones... did it the hard way. That hardwood floor in the living
room, dovetailed the pieces myself... did it the hard way. The ceiling
beams, made 'em out of my own oak trees... did it the hard way."
Just then, the farmer's gorgeous daughter walked in. The farmer
looks over at the real estate agent who is trying not to stare too
obviously and smiles. "Yep... standing up in a canoe."
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 883 of 1371|
A real friend isn't someone you use once and then throw away.
A real friend is someone you can use over and over again.
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 884 of 1371|
A real gentleman never takes bases unless he really has to.
-- Overheard in an algebra lecture.
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 885 of 1371|
A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking
ticket and rejoices that the system works.
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 886 of 1371|
A recent study has found that concentrating on difficult off-screen
objects, such as the faces of loved ones, causes eye strain in computer
scientists. Researchers into the phenomenon cite the added concentration
needed to "make sense" of such unnatural three dimensional objects.
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 887 of 1371|
A rich man told me recently that a liberal is a man who tells other
people what to do with their money.
-- Imamu Amiri Baraka (Leroi Jones)