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A timely marriage: one made before your children start nagging you about it.
-- Diane Duane
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A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything
but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.
-- Ambrose Bierce
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A transistor protected by a fast-acting
fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.
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A traveling salesman was driving past a farm when he saw a pig with three
wooden legs executing a magnificent series of backflips and cartwheels.
Intrigued, he drove up to the farmhouse, where he found an old farmer
sitting in the yard watching the pig.
"That's quite a pig you have there, sir" said the salesman.
"Sure is, son," the farmer replied. "Why, two years ago, my daughter
was swimming in the lake and bumped her head and damned near drowned, but that
pig swam out and dragged her back to shore."
"Amazing!" the salesman exclaimed.
"And that's not the only thing. Last fall I was cuttin' wood up on
the north forty when a tree fell on me. Pinned me to the ground, it did.
That pig run up and wiggled underneath that tree and lifted it off of me.
Saved my life."
"Fantastic! the salesman said. But tell me, how come the pig has
three wooden legs?"
The farmer stared at the newcomer in amazement. "Mister, when you
got an amazin' pig like that, you don't eat him all at once."
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A true artist will let his wife starve, his children go barefoot, his mother
drudge for his living at seventy, sooner than work at anything but his art.
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A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
|Freebsd Fortunes 2: 947 of 1371|
A truly wise woman never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
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A truth that's told with bad intent
Beats all the lies you can invent.
-- William Blake
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A university is what a college becomes
when the faculty loses interest in students.
-- John Ciardi
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A vacuum is a hell of a lot better
than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with.
-- Tennessee Williams