Linux Kids

Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when
you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
                -- Fran Lebowitz, "Social Studies"

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore
them long enough.

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth
to a child.  She must be found and stopped.
                -- Sam Levenson

Teach children to be polite and courteous in the home, and, when they grow up,
they won't be able to edge a car onto a freeway.

Test-tube babies shouldn't throw stones.

That all men should be brothers is the dream of people who have no brothers.
                -- Charles Chincholles, "Pensees de tout le monde"

The average income of the modern teenager is about 2 a.m.

        The courtroom was pregnant (pun intended) with anxious silence as the
judge solemnly considered his verdict in the paternity suit before him.
Suddenly, he reached into the folds of his robes, drew out a cigar and
ceremoniously handed it to the defendant.
        "Congratulations!" declaimed the jurist.  "You have just become a
father!"

The denunciation of the young is a necessary part of the hygiene of older
people, and greatly assists in the circulation of the blood.
                -- Logan Pearsall Smith

The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable
Christian forbearance among men.
                -- Ambrose Bierce