Linux Kids

I tell ya, I was an ugly kid.  I was so ugly that my dad kept the kid's
picture that came with the wallet he bought.
                -- Rodney Dangerfield

I told my kids, "Someday, you'll have kids of your own."  One of them said,
"So will you."
                -- Rodney Dangerfield

I used to think I was a child; now I think I am an adult -- not because
I no longer do childish things, but because those I call adults are no
more mature than I am.

I was born because it was a habit in those days, people didn't know
anything else ... I was not a Child Prodigy, because a Child Prodigy is
a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up.
                -- Will Rogers

If a child annoys you, quiet him by brushing his hair.  If this doesn't
work, use the other side of the brush on the other end of the child.

If parents would only realize how they bore their children.
                -- G.B. Shaw

If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.
                -- Nora Ephron, "Heartburn"

If the very old will remember, the very young will listen.
                -- Chief Dan George

If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent.
                -- Bette Davis

If your mother knew what you're doing, she'd probably hang her head and cry.