Freebsd Fortunes 6

This isn't true in practice -- what we've missed out is Stradivarius's
constant.  And then the aside: "For those of you who don't know, that's
been called by others the fiddle factor..."
                -- From a 1B Electrical Engineering lecture.

This land is my land, and only my land,
I've got a shotgun, and you ain't got one,
If you don't get off, I'll blow your head off,
This land is private property.
                -- Apologies to Woody Guthrie

This life is a test.  It is only a test.  Had this been an
actual life, you would have received further instructions as
to what to do and where to go.

This life is yours.  Some of it was given
to you; the rest, you made yourself.

This login session: $13.76, but for you $11.88.

This login session: $13.99

This must be morning.  I never could get the hang of mornings.

This night methinks is but the daylight sick.
                -- William Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"

This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but to be hurled with
great force.
                -- Dorothy Parker

This one is for all you military types.  For those who don't know, Rangers
are *extremely* well trained members of the U.S. Army.  Marines are people
who start out as normal soldiers and then are made to believe that bullets
don't actually hurt.
        One day a platoon of Marines are on patrol when they come upon a
Ranger relaxing on top of a small hill. The Ranger puts his hands on his
hips and screams out, "Do any of you seaweed sucking jarheads think you're
man enough to take me on?"
        The biggest Marine comes running up the hill, screaming back at the
Ranger.  When he gets to the top he simply plows into his foe and the two
tumble down the other side of the hill, out of sight.  There is the sound of
a horrendous fight for a moment or two, and then all is quiet.  Soon, the
Ranger reappears, quite untouched.  He puts his hands on his hips and sneers,
"Well, looks to me like one of you couldn't do it, how about the rest?"
        The enraged Marine platoon leader sends his entire platoon (30+men)
charging after the Ranger.  They all go tumbling down the far side of the hill.
After 15 minutes of screaming and yelling and cursing a lone, bloodied Marine
crawls over the top of the hill. The platoon leader yells up to his man,
"What's going on up there?" The wounded Marine, with his last bit of breath,
replies, "Sir, it's a... a trap, sir.  They're two of them!"