| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1541 of 2298 |
Q: How does a WASP propose marriage?
A: "How would you like to be buried with my people?"
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1542 of 2298 |
Q: How many Bell Labs Vice Presidents does it take to change a light bulb?
A: That's proprietary information. Answer available from AT&T on payment
of license fee (binary only).
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1543 of 2298 |
Q: How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assure everyone that everything possible is being
done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1544 of 2298 |
Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Five. One to screw in the lightbulb and four to share the
experience. (Actually, Californians don't screw in
lightbulbs, they screw in hot tubs.)
Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to screw in the lightbulb and two to fend off all
those Californians trying to share the experience.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1545 of 2298 |
Q: How many college football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Only one, but he gets three credits for it.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1546 of 2298 |
Q: How many DEC repairmen does it take to fix a flat?
A: Five; four to hold the car up and one to swap tires.
Q: How long does it take?
A: It's indeterminate.
It will depend upon how many flats they've brought with them.
Q: What happens if you've got TWO flats?
A: They replace your generator.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1547 of 2298 |
Q: How many Democrats does it take to enjoy a good joke?
A: One more than you can find.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1548 of 2298 |
Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug?
A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back.
Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator?
A: There's a footprint in the mayo.
Q: How can you tell if two elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: There's two footprints in the mayo.
Q: How can you tell if three elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: The door won't shut.
Q: How can you tell if four elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: There's a VW Bug in your driveway.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1549 of 2298 |
Q: How many hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. We'll fix it in software.
Q: How many system programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. The application can work around it.
Q: How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. We'll document it in the manual.
Q: How many tech writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. The user can figure it out.
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| Freebsd Fortunes 5: 1550 of 2298 |
Q: How many Harvard MBA's does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Just one. He grasps it firmly and the universe revolves around him.
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