Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday February 10, 2013

An old maid who had a pet ape Lived in fear of perpetual rape...
An old maid who had a pet ape Lived in fear of perpetual rape. His red, hairy phallus So filled her with malice That she sealed up her snatch with Scotch tape.

There was a young belle of old Natchez Whose garments were...
There was a young belle of old Natchez Whose garments were always in patchez. When comment arose On the state of her clothes She, drawled, "When ah itchez, ah scratchez."

Blessed are those who go around in circles, for they shall...
Blessed are those who go around in circles, for they shall be known as wheels.

Woman's advice has little value, but he who won't take it is...
Woman's advice has little value, but he who won't take it is a fool. -- Cervantes