Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday September 13, 2019

A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence...
A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence misspent. So she climbed up the dome Of St. Peter's in Rome, Where she stayed through the following Lent. -- Edward Gorey

There once was a queen of Bulgaria Whose bush had grown hairier...
There once was a queen of Bulgaria Whose bush had grown hairier and hairier, Till a prince from Peru Who came up for a screw Had to hunt for her cunt with a terrier.

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

There once was a man who went to a computer trade show. Each...
There once was a man who went to a computer trade show. Each day as he entered, the man told the guard at the door: "I am a great thief, renowned for my feats of shoplifting. Be forewarned, for this trade show shall not escape...