Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday October 20, 2020

A burlesque dancer, a pip Named Virginia, could peel in a zip; ...
A burlesque dancer, a pip Named Virginia, could peel in a zip; But she read science fiction And died of constriction Attempting a Moebius strip. -- Cyril Kornbluth, "The Unfortunate Topology"

A cautious young fellow named Lodge, Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge, Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. With his date all strapped in He committed a sin Without even leaving the garage. -- "A Boy and His Dog"

There was a young cook with the art Of making a delicious tart ...
There was a young cook with the art Of making a delicious tart With a handful of shit, Some snot and some spit, And he'd flavor the whole with a fart.

There was a young girl of East Lynne Whose mother, to save...
There was a young girl of East Lynne Whose mother, to save her from sin, Had filled up her crack, To the brim with shellac, But the boys picked it out with a pin.

Dijkstra probably hates me (Linus Torvalds, in kernel/sched.c)
Dijkstra probably hates me (Linus Torvalds, in kernel/sched.c)