Daily FortunesJan 26, 2017
One difference between a man and a machine is that a machine... One difference between a man and a machine is that a machine is quiet
when well oiled.
One dusty July afternoon, somewhere around the turn of... One dusty July afternoon, somewhere around the turn of the century, Patrick
Malone was in Mulcahey's Bar, bending an elbow with the other street car
conductors from the Brooklyn Traction Company. While they were discussing the
merits of a local ring hero, the bar goes...
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential... Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups --
alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
-- Alex Levine
PLEASE DON'T SMOKE HERE!
Penalty: An early, lingering death... PLEASE DON'T SMOKE HERE!
Penalty: An early, lingering death from cancer,
emphysema, or other smoking-caused ailment.
Police: Good evening, are you the host?
Host: No.
Police:... Police: Good evening, are you the host?
Host: No.
Police: We've been getting complaints about this party.
Host: About the drugs?
Police: No.
Host: About the guns, then? Is somebody complaining about the guns?
Police: No, the noise.
Host: Oh, the noise. Well that...
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Daily Fortunes for Jan 26, 2017
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