Daily Fortunes

Nov 16, 2017

So I'm ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face...
So I'm ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face. -- Yogi Berra

Son, someday a man is going to walk up to you with a deck...
Son, someday a man is going to walk up to you with a deck of cards on which the seal is not yet broken. And he is going to offer to bet you that he can make the Ace of Spades jump out of the deck and squirt cider in your ears. But son, do not bet this man, for you will...

Support Bingo, keep Grandma off the streets.
Support Bingo, keep Grandma off the streets.

Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.

Ten of the meanest cons in the state pen met in the corner...
Ten of the meanest cons in the state pen met in the corner of the yard to shoot some craps. The stakes were enormous, the tension palpable. When his turn came to shoot, Dutsky nervously plunked down his entire wad, shook the dice and rolled. A smile crossed...

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