Freebsd Fortunes 7
fortune: 1051 - 1060 of 1340 from freebsd fortunes 7
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Sep 25, 2017
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Freebsd Fortunes 7

Fortune: 1051 - 1060 of 1340 from Freebsd Fortunes 7

Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1051 of 1340

You know you're in trouble when...
(1)     Your only son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind
                her own business.
(2)     You put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
(3)     You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.
(4)     You see a `60 Minutes' news team waiting in your office.
(5)     Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
(6)     Your 4-year old reveals that it's "almost impossible" to
                flush a grapefruit down the toilet.
(7)     You realize that you've memorized the back of the cereal box.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1052 of 1340

You know you're in trouble when...
(1)     You've been at work for an hour before you notice that your
                skirt is caught in your pantyhose.
(2)     Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife.
(3)     Your income tax check bounces.
(4)     You put both contact lenses in the same eye.
(5)     Your wife says, "Good morning, Bill" and your name is George.
(6)     You wake up to the soothing sound of flowing water... the day
                after you bought a waterbed.
(7)     You go on your honeymoon to a remote little hotel and the desk
                clerk, bell hop, and manager have a "Welcome Back" party
                for your spouse.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1053 of 1340

You know you've been sitting in front of your Lisp machine too long
when you go out to the junk food machine and start wondering how to
make it give you the CADR of Item H so you can get that yummie
chocolate cupcake that's stuck behind the disgusting vanilla one.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1054 of 1340

You know you've landed gear-up when it takes full power to taxi.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1055 of 1340

You learn to write as if to someone else
because NEXT YEAR YOU WILL BE "SOMEONE ELSE".
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1056 of 1340

You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1057 of 1340

You lived with a man who wore white belts?
Laura, I'm disappointed in you.
                -- Remington Steele
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1058 of 1340

You look tired.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1059 of 1340

You love peace.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 7:  1060 of 1340

You love your home and want it to be beautiful.
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